Due to increasing product liability litigation, breweries have reluctantly accepted the government’s suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all varieties of alcoholic beverage containers…

WARNING:

Drinking too much alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better-looking than most people.

WARNING:

Drinking too much alcohol may lead you to think people are laughing WITH you!

WARNING:

Drinking too much alcohol may cause you to think that you can sing.

WARNING:

Drinking too much alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.

WARNING:

Drinking too much alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

WARNING:

Drinking too much alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra.

WARNING:

Drinking alcohol may lead you to believe that ex-lovers are really dying for you to phone them at four in the morning.